Hic Sunt Dracones

the smylere with the knyf under the cloke

Posts Tagged ‘moleskine

My Friend

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There was once a very lovely, very frightened girl.

She lived alone except for a nameless cat.

My Messy Moleskine

Image by Alexandre Dulaunoy via Flickr

I’ve been revisiting the moleskine diary again. The last jotted ink was dry since my past birthday. Nothing much written on that last one except the summary of the years’ written words inside the black bind cahier. A summary of the year 2009. In a very succinct form and if it’s a colour it would be a faltering hue of grey, a glimmering ray of silver and haphazard strokes of blue. The colour of conscience, hope and life at sea — and the love of the ocean. Considering it was soak in brine once.

“In case of loss, please return to” and “as a reward: $” were the printed words at the first page of the moleskine. There’s never a monetary reward written on it but I do mull on the ever cryptic xoxo and xxx. Depends on whom who find it as a romantics or sober samaritan. There’s still blank pages unused from the countless doodles and periodic rants. It’s worth more to the founder than the owner. If he’s the type who didn’t type but writes.

My Friend.

Holly Golightly in Hell

Image by bixentro via Flickr

The title originated in one particular scene in Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961) when Paul (George Peppard) slowly typed on his typewriter and then came forth the line of a lovely girl and a nameless cat.

The strings and soft voice of Holly (Audrey Hepburn) came in tandem with the lines and she sang Moon River at the window sill with calm composure and remote emotion.

Two of them broke the silence with greetings when she ended the song with a blank stare to the finite space.

I felt so invested with the emotion with a simple a ‘hi’ and the soft ‘oh’ that it moved me to write in the abandoned notebook. I remember the dialogs, I wrote the lyrics and I spelled the emotion. Why it doesn’t affect me as it does 5 years or 10 years ago when I first saw the movie. Why do I favour the Louis Armstrong version back then, when her voice is more sincere? Why do I think this passing scene so suddenly became so magically enthralling in the history of celluloid?

I don’t know.

Yet I do know that I’ve been missing the details in the past decades in favour of end result. The last view wasn’t out of love for lyrical and cinematography value but out of entertainment. I’m not saying that I dissect the current view with empirical proportion but I can feel the sincerity without satirical exhaustion. Two non-matrimony relationship taught me how to endure as a wounded bipedal mammal. Another two pre-matrimony relationship ended me as a quadruped mammal on my back looking at the sky, like a half-dead panda munching bamboo on a deforested patch of urbanised land.

What I’m saying is, or what I think that I’m supposed to say is that I’m becoming less sardonic. Less cynical with romance, but I’ll never be without one when it comes to the world view. Always one with a cynical eye (or eyes).

I keep my optimism alive still with romance. In the back sleeve of the black cahier moleskine lies 3 pieces of paper of optimism and sentimentality.

My first Singapore dollar note from that damsel in distress who (almost) ruin my academic life in United Kingdom.

Train ticket with hand-written notes as I sat for hours on that last train station for the Seremban girl to wake up for a cup of coffee at Starbucks on Saturday morning.

The Sunway girl’s signature on a folded receipt from her flight to Neverwhere with a purple binded book of The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran as a gift to me.

The trinkets were there to remind.

Just as the words are.

They’re lovely friends who’s now in love with their nameless cat — their significant other.

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On a different note. The WordPress Zemanta plugin for recommended media gallery is fun to use. Who doesn’t like tattered moleskine and Banksy-ish stencil graffiti?

Everclear, Never Clear

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Some people can conjure mean things when they don’t get what they want. They start to do shit like your friend did, or starting to say something along the line ‘you owe me a lot’ and blabla RM blabla.

That’s quite rich from someone who takes most of selective statement from me as mere rhetorical expression.

First, she got pretty adamant with the value of her reply is binding with valid form of citation. Which I didn’t stated it electronically (in the oh-so-public Facebook with selected circle of friends, micro-blogging of Twitter or Tumblr, or even wordpress), but I did in written form in my moleskine — which also was questioned by her the need to keep a written journal on Moleskine.

Second, the whole fiasco about a simple thing as receiving one “mass sms” and being resolute with my other text afterward as being exact copy to others. Do I have to elaborate things like: “I’m boarding my plane to the plane of echolalia.” Or do I have to make a creative writing on the passing of loved one, just to be unique per messages?

Third, what part of sarcasm she doesn’t realized when I mention about monetary depreciation in tandem with this statement:

It’s easier to make the argument worse by divulging financial losses. That’s when alimony issues arise.

It’s a non-sequitur irony to the power of null. Equal to ONE simple comprehension. And yes, I do keep track of my expenses on my Excel Spreadsheet since last 5 years. Like my dad said (who did financial auditing and accounting before he retired):

Buat kira-kira, tapi jangan berkira.

Count the penny, don’t be pinchpenny.

I don’t think it’s Ebenezer Scrooge paranoia when my last relationship I got £1700 cheque somewhere in her bank account — for working visa to UK. That’s quite a lot in RM, you know. I’m not an offspring of Sarawakian Timber Towkey.

When someone request an amount of cash as a loan. It didn’t suppose to mean ex gratia even if it’s given with bona fide. What am I, a pro bono dunce?

An increase in monetary gain can always put us in a different kind of perspective. A new sight of people can always put us to see things in different way. We become more stingy [stingier?] even if we earn much more than what we used to. We become vain when we don’t look like we used to. We become proud when we are not in the level that we used to. We become heartless even we used to be humble.

If I can get away with my bank with these “empathetic angst” everytime they ask me to pay my credit card. I’m scot-free.

Am I always this angry? Only on the internet. As angry as An Irritable Panda.

By the way, in that successful publicised notes on facebook amongst her closest friends and saints, the Everclear’s I Will Buy You A New Life lyrics is the epitome of irony when she “conjure mean things when she don’t get (understood) what the reality wanted”

Here is the money that I owe you 

So you can pay the bills

I will give you more when I get paid again

I hate those people who love to tell you

Money is the root of all that kills

To malign me as Ebenezer Scrooge is one thing, being demonised as Shylock, The Merchant of Venice is the demon of all miser.

I can stand Charles Dickens, but William Shakespeare? Not cool. Let’s play “empathetic angst” game, me as the Shylock — the heartless creditor.

SHYLOCK: Hath not a Jew eyes? Hath not a Jew hands, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, passions, fed with the same food, hurt with the same weapons, subject to the same diseases, healed by the same means, warmed and cooled by the same winter and summer, as a Christian is? If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?

— William Shakespeare (1564–1616), English poet and playwright. The Merchant of Venice, Act 3, Scene 1.

Oh, please. Don’t spit upon my Jewish gaberdine. Yes, I notice the irony of this too.

LORENZO: How every fool can play upon the word!

William Shakespeare (1564–1616), English poet and playwright. The Merchant of Venice, Act 3, Scene 5.

Did I ever ask for a pound of flesh? Yes, in a perverted way — Bar Refaeli!

I’m a faux Jew, and I love the Israeli model; Bar Refaeli (בר רפאלי). I had been looking for the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition at the Borders and MPH without avail. Oh, how I heart thee, international Zionist celebrity. I wish I could savour her as I sipped my equally Zionist Starbucks’ Caramel Macchiato at the Borders — whom the barrista at the The Gardens keep pronouncing the name with phlegmy pseudo-american accent. WHeip? WHeup? Oh, Whip Cream. Laila? Pardon my mate(s), for he/she hardly assent to your barista pretentiousness.

I wish I didn’t have to resort being this divulging. Yet Moleskine written journal is indistinct inside the black cahier bind.

Oh, f*ck, now my FB friends know this wordpress link (or maybe not).

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Caveat: The gravity of this entry can be taken selectively e.g. I’m a pro-Semitic capitalist or I’m an irritable panda in real life. Be free to reconcile with mutual kiss-and-forget or retaliation with nondescript monologue.

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Look ma, I can do “mass note(s)” too.

Writing Is a Form of Therapy; Sometimes I Wonder How All Those Who Do Not Write, Compose or Paint Can Manage to Escape the Madness, the Melancholia, the Panic Fear

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Helvetica Project (Moleskine Edition)

Helvetica Project (Moleskine Edition)

…the panic fear which is inherent in the human situation.

— Graham Greene (1904–1991), British novelist. Ways of Escape.

Εββ asked — bluntly —  does Moleskine® makes my writing better. She didn’t emphasize whether it’s my grammar, narrative or writing style. Since that would be weird for someone with literature background to question the medium of written prose, be it papyrus or stone tablet. It’s the content that’s matter — and the expression.

It must be my hideous handwritting (unlike some people that I know of).

If the medium would be the case. Maybe I should write electronically. This is where Wacom Intuos3 A5 (PTZ630) and Wacom Bamboo Fun A5 (CTE-650K) come in. The latter for my sister who’s into deviantART deviations.

While the Intuos3 would be a perfect match for the new 17″ MacBook Pro (waiting for the shipment). Why Intuos3? Ergonomics

Mouse Arm Syndrome (MAS) is a general term for the injuries that result from repetitive, forceful movements in body parts such as fingers, hands, arms and shoulders. Using a traditional computer mouse involves repetitive, prolonged clicking with the user’s hand and forearm twisted at an awkward, unnatural angle. This can lead to sore muscles and significantly increases the risk of RSI.

RSI stands for Repetitive Strain Injury. My right hand have this tingling sensation during the prolong use of mouse. I must been affected with Carpal Tunnel Syndrome (CTS) since the advent of internet in my life. Bloglines really help me with better reading experience, using keyboard to browse the RSS entries. For graphic and video editing, I need something more natural to the nimble digits. Pen tablets is the answer.

Why Intuous3? It compliments my first DSLR: Canon EOS 5D Mark II. I need something to do the dodge and burn, tilf-shift and HDR effects, as easy as manipulating brush strokes.

Before this entry sounds like gadget commercial (Engadget or Gizmodo) from an artsy fartsy mensch. I better start to act apathetic and monotonous like some of you would expect from someone who work offshore for effing 3-6 months.

To be distinctly cultured have their risk. Better to be subtly philistine and mundane. In one of the inner subset instead the outlaying cluster of dark spot. In her case, I can celebrate the joy of celibacy now, since I got ample phallic gadgetry to masturbate with. Yeay! *orgasmic-sarcasm*

Meh. (That’s from me)

Have a go at Ken Follett’s The Pillar of the Earth. The story of the building of a magnificent cathederal, written by an atheist. Thank you, Mr. Taylor (Diving Operation Superintendent) for the book suggestion (after a rambling conversation about Nietzsche’s dead god and Camus’s dying god).

Meh. (That’s from her)

Why Intuous3? I know it’s silly to buy one (or two) just because of my fugly handwritting. Perhaps the smooth moleskine paper texture would help to improve my handwriting in a way, and the pen tablet for hand dexterity, as well as reducing the pain around my wrist.

*fap*

*fap*

*fap*

Wilt Thou Go Ask the Mole(skine)®?

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Does the Eagle know what is in the pit? 
Or wilt thou go ask the Mole? 
Can Wisdom be put in a silver rod? 
Or Love in a golden bowl?

William Blake (1757–1827), British poet, painter, engraver, and mystic.
The Book of Thel “Thel’s Motto”.

I started to write journal again and a little bit of sketching. On paper. With Moleskine® no less.

Oh, how much I love the feel of the paper.

The longest time I kept a journal was the last 3 years ago…when I’m in love.

Now, I found a new love.

Written by cthulhu

January 30, 2009 at 12:51 pm

Posted in life and dream

Tagged with , , ,